God Can Talk to You About Your Marriage Through a Dream
I had a dream recently where I was at work and a co-worker told me about another job. She told me that this other business was very interested in me and would hire me. She also said that she would set up the interview. Before I interviewed I started planning to move, which did not include my husband, not because I didn’t want him to come, in my mind it didn’t make sense that he would move because his job was in one state and my new job was in another.
When I woke up I wondered what that could mean? There are a couple of thing i gleaned from this dream, but I’m going to focus on one aspect of it – the husband part. In real life, I would never make a decision to take a job and move without my husband. We would make the decision together and we would move or not move together.
The more I pondered the dream, the more I wondered if this was a warning dream. Remember when God warned Abimelech in a dream in Genesis 20:3 NAS, God says, “Behold, you are a dead man because of the woman whom you have taken, for she is married.”
If it is a warning, could there be a “wall” or disagreement/offense between me and husband? Something that would cause me to just make decisions on my own without his wisdom? Could the Lord be showing me a little fox now that could eventually become full blown and distroy the vineyard?
Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom. Song of Solomon 2:15 NIV
In my prayer time, I asked the Lord to show me. He revealed to me that I was carrying offense. At first I was shocked, “Me Lord?” “Yes, you,” He said. “But I’m happy and we’re in love and I don’t think we have any problems.”
However, what I discovered was that I had been magnifying the things that I think are wrong with Nathan, stupid little things like a dish in the sink, instead of celebrating who he is, acknowledging what he brings to the table, how good he treats me, how he takes care of our family, how he is a gift to me an how he serves me. Somehow I was carrying an offense – small or big it didn’t matter.
Frankly, it just takes one offense and a mindset that follows it that will take you down the wrong path. Sometimes I wonder how married couples end up falling out of love and just living together, not being intimate, not even being friends. I think offense is how it starts. Then people use the excuse that they “have changed” and its time for a new life, new spouse. Of course they changed, they allowed offense to creep in, fostered it, fed it and after years of it they shifted their heart. It’s the ultimate deception that the enemy uses in any relationship. This is why we need to run to the Lord daily. He shows us these things and gives us remedies to come back to truth.
As I started to thank the Lord and bless Nathan, I could feel myself being set free from anger, bitterness, offense and lies that I had believed about him. While these things were so small, and typical things that most people, even Christians, allow as culturally ok, I knew these to be wrong. The better I felt the more I realized that I had been deceived big time and it was this dream that caused me to stop and ponder, seek the Lord for an answer and receive a new outlook, shifting my heart back to the place of love toward my husband. I couldn’t believe what some offense and grumbling had caused in my heart.
I’m sure this won’t be the first or last time I have to do this. After three years of marriage, I’ve learned that it’s messy sometimes and that’s ok. We are moving from glory to glory and iron sharpens iron. Transformation hurts sometimes. And frankly, I think marriage is meant to transform us more toward the image of Christ, and for that I’m grateful.